Probably the biggest obstacle in connecting with our courage to change is the fear of letting go. For me, the true meaning of courage is to, with my heart thumping wildly in my chest, my stomach in knots and my knees shaking, is to step out anyway. It absolutely is NOT easy, but taking that step anyway is really the most powerful way to advance to the position that the universe, the creator, your very existence has for you.
I’ve made two major leaps in my life. The first one was in 1997, I mustered the courage to leave an abusive relationship. As I was leaving, I was told that I’d never have anything, that I’d never go any where and that I’d never be anybody. Those cutting words took me many years to outrun and overcome, and I sometimes still hear them as a faint whisper in the back of my head.
The second one was in the fall of 2015 when I was told that I had to either start doing a 6 hour per day commute or be laid off from my job. Because I’d already been working from home for 8 years, with a commute of 3 feet from my bedroom to my office, taking on a 6 hour per day commute was not something I was interested in doing. So, I summoned all my courage and took the scary leap to leave my job and strike out on my own.
That journey has been a roller coaster for sure and has led me down paths I would have never imagined, but paths that have ultimately been life changing and life reaffirming to me. It is why I do what I do!
So, I’m extremely grateful that in spite of my fear, when I directed my energies to a place of hope, believed that all things were possible, and relied on my courage to change, things all began to turn around.
My challenge for you is this, get still, and ask yourself these questions:
What changes do you need to make to move forward?
What’s keeping you from the life you want and deserve?
Deepak Chopra says:
For many people change is threatening, they may want a more fulfilling job, relationship or lifestyle but moving into the unknown is scary.
That’s when merely hoping for change is ineffective because it postpones taking the actual steps forward that hope can support. One way or another we are all caught between wanting change and fearing what the unknown may bring. But we know that the only constant in life is change and clinging to the old familiar way doesn’t stop change, it just keeps you stuck.
If change is inevitable, defending against it is futile. The real question is how to guide change. To create the best outcome without anxiety. Holding on to the past is what prevents us from accepting change. The wounds and traumas of the past, cling in memory. The most self-defeating ones are our unconscious habits, conditioning, beliefs and traumas that sank in so deeply they became part of our everyday self.
To release the grip of the past, we must first be aware, because you cannot change what you are not aware of. Self-awareness means that you consciously witness something from your past that has become ingrained.
Without judgement you say, I no longer need this, I’m a different person now. The noticing comes first. If you find yourself reacting negatively to any person or situation, stop and look inside. Is this reaction of anxiety, anger, worry, distaste or distress something you’ve seen before? Are you saying or doing things that keep repeating themselves in a regular pattern? This is the past, coming up to claim the present. When you say inside, I no longer need this, you’re reclaiming the present moment.
You don’t need to force the new response. Instead, let this moment of self-awareness sink in. Be quiet and easy with yourself. By noticing and being aware without judgement, you give your mind permission to do what it wants to do, which is to settle down into baseline of open, quiet, non-judgemental awareness.
By preferring to remain in the core of your being, you release the past and its imprints. Then change happens as part of the flow of life, without threat or anxiety.
Try sitting comfortably with your feet on the floor and your back straight and rest your hands in your lap, palms up. Gently lower your chin, close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing. Feel your belly rise with each breath in and feel your warm breath from your nostrils on each exhale. Use this centering thought as your concentrate on your breathing.
Hope tells me anything can be transformed ~ Deepak Chopra
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